Love, when it is still new and shiny, can be very uncertain territory. About fifteen years ago, my husband and I were still new in our relationship. So new, that he thought I was being coy when I stated that Valentine’s Day was not a holiday I put much stock in. It just isn’t. It’s a day when people who love each other are obligated to publicly display that love with gifts and/or flowers and for single people to feel isolated and sad. What kind of holiday is that? (I do celebrate it with my kiddies though.)
I love my husband every day…no more and no less than I do on February 14.
I totally should dig out the photos from the before children time but I am lazy.
But there is a Valentine’s Day that I will never forget. It was our first and possibly the last one we celebrated.
Our first Valentine’s Day together we were in Miami, where my mother lived. Yes–this was the first time I brought him to meet her. My new boyfriend, who was a submariner with the US Navy at the time, had just gotten back from patrol so didn’t have time to go shopping for a Valentine’s gift. He had confessed to me that he had previously broken up with girls before Valentine’s Day so he wouldn’t be obligated to buy a gift or take them out!
Since he wanted to spend every second of our trip with me (because I am awesome), he asked my mother, whom he had just met, to grab me a Valentine’s Day gift from him.
My beautiful mom
My poor sweet boyfriend.
1) He really should have believed me about Valentine’s Day but he was a boy that was used to girls that really cared about this day.
2) He really should have asked anyone else in the world besides my mother to get the gift.
My mom is pretty cool. However, her idea of a Valentine’s gift for a new girlfriend are probably not the norm. I am pretty sure Hubs expected her to get me chocolates and a card or a bear. Not my mother.
My mom likes pretty, frilly, lacy things.
My mom doesn’t care that he had only known me a few months, most of which he spent under water with no communication with the outside world. (Please note: being a submariner’s wife or girlfriend is not the easiest thing in the world. Actually it sucks.) There’s no shame in her game, either. She got me a gift that she would have liked to receive herself.
That evening, he gave me a perfectly wrapped box, which clearly was my mother’s handiwork. He had no idea what was in the box, but he didn’t mind me opening it in front of her since she had picked it out!
I pulled out several pairs of the laciest, ruffliest, sheerest panties I had ever seen in my life. His face turned bright red. Just like one of the red thongs dangling from my finger. I don’t know if it was because of the gifts or because the woman he just met purchased them for me from him. But, I will never forget that day.
As a matter of fact, I will never forget that trip. We had a great time. My mother cooked all sorts of delicious Filipino food for him. She had a big party and she and Hubs got drunk together. My drunk boyfriend told my drunk mother late that evening that he was going to marry me. She said, “okay” and laughed. The last laugh was on me. I got the fancy underpants and an almost-but-not-quite-marriage proposal. (He never did ask me.)